Today I will divide up this blog into three stories, all very different from each other.
A few days ago a customer held up some chintzy thing and asked:
"Is it okay if I run this OUTSIDE to my husband WHO IS NOT IN THE STORE AND CANNOT BE SEEN FROM INSIDE OF THE STORE so that I can ask him what he thinks about it?" (emphasis added and might not have been said by real customer)
Me: "Uh. No."
Yes. I am very unreasonable. How dare I not let a strange woman take a non-paid for item out into the parking lot and into her car? I am such an unfeeling person and should be hanged.
Customer: Can I steal this creepy doll?
I want to say yes...
I was helping a gentleman find a gift for a friend. He was looking at the bracelets and asked if he could see one so I unlocked the case and handed it to him.
"You know," said he, "it's a little expensive, but she's worth it."
Awwwww.... Can you say adorable?
It was ruined only by my thought of the lady's I had overheard once, so all I could think of was, "I hope he's not trying to seduce anyone." Yes. There is something wrong with me.
3. Eh, creepy? or Aw, nice!
Here's one from memory lane. When I worked at Staples as a cashier I was helping a dude and he needed some heavy thing from the back. I called up a co-worker and they went to find it. Then they didn't come back. And I had other customers. The dude I was helping graciously stepped to the side so that I could help the massively long line, since I was the only cashier. (I blame this on corporate.) I thought, "That's nice." Until I realized he was kinda' sorta' STARING at me. Yup. He was standing with his hands in his pockets, relaxed, just watching me.
Can I say weird? Can I saw nerve-wracking? Can I say Are You a Stalker? I saw him from the corner of my eye, but tried to ignore him while I helped customers, and kept praying that my co-worker would HURRY up and bringing the dude's stuff up.
Finally, after a torturous amount of time, my co-worker brought up the guys large desk, or whatever, and I rang him up as quickly as I could without being rushed. I managed NOT to look at him like he was crazy, smiling and everything. (This was at the beginning of my time in retail, when I still had patience.) The guy leans forward and says,
"You have a very calming demeanor." He smiled. He left.
I kinda' wish I had said: "You do NOT have a very calming demeanor."
I still can't decide if he was being creepy, or if he was being nice.
Kinda' like dolls. Nice or Creepy?